How much did your wife cost?

 
Dad always reckoned Mum cost him 18 shillings. This is why:-


I reckon most wives cost a fair bit more than that. (We won’t go down the road of mentioning what happens when you marry twice....)
 

Going to the Cinema

When I was young, the film at the cinema was usually preceded by a ‘short’ – this was either a newscast, a brief documentary (“Today we take a look at the manufacture of glass...”) or occasionally a second, short, film.

Sometimes the cinemas had programmes, something which was apparently far more common before the War.

And, of course, the ice cream girls appeared at the bottom of the aisles at the half-time break. Apparently in some cinemas in the 1930s ice creams were only supplied during children’s matinee films. Evening performances (which at 9d were more expensive) included a tray of tea and fancy biscuits.

The above photo of the Abbey Cinema in Wavertree was taken when I was in my teens and Cinerama had just recently been introduced.

Things I remember

Things I remember that don’t happen nowadays – at least not to me!

Taking a can to the hardware store to get it filled with paraffin for the paraffin heather.

The rag and bone man with his horse and cart and later just a handcart coming down the road shouting ‘Any Old Iron’ though it sounded like ‘Neeien’ . The shout and clip clop of the horse’s hooves are probably the most evocative sound of the road in the 1950s. By the time the 1960s came the horses had disappeared and vans from Hunter’s Handy Hams hurtled down the road at great speed to the real annoyance of the residents.

Elasticated belts of red and green stripes with an s-shaped metal snake clip.

The knife sharpener wheeling his bicycle to the door to sharpen Dad’s shears.

The black burned bits on the top of a rice pudding floating around one’s bowl in a most off-putting manner.

The chimney sweep (Mr Downs) with all his brushes on his bike. Putting a great dustsheet over the fireplace and slowly feeding his brush through, screwing each successive section onto the handle.

We didn't have school trips from prep school - the furthest we went was occasionally across the road to King George V playing fields where a grumpy groundsman would watch the girls tucking their skirts up into their knickers and rolling down the hill or making daisy chains. I can't recall what we boys did (apart from watching the girls!) - I suppose it was catching a tennis ball or handstands or something, we weren't allowed to kick a football there.

Mr Judson driving his Morris Traveller up to the gate and unloading the groceries on the rare occasions we had them delivered.

The fish van coming around and the neighbours looking in the back to choose some fresh fish. I can’t recall Mum ever buying from him.

Standing around, hopping from one foot to the other, as Mum talked to some neighbour or other on the way to the shops.

Being caned by Miss Twomey who had a strong right arm and used it to good effect. She also used a thick cane which bruised your hand and made it throb. Mr Illingworth - who only caned me once - used a thin whippy cane that momentarily stung but the pain of which was gone in a few minutes.

Mum working from home doing jobs like making hares for the race track. Her boss would drop off wire frames and loads of calico and she would sew the hares. Special occasions demanded posh hares and these were of a gold plush material which was awful to sew because it kept slipping.

The attic room at Nana’s with thousands of locks and keys from Grandpa's case-making days.

When a horse (presumably pulling the coal cart, milk cart or rag and bone cart) deposited its droppings outside our house one time Dad went out with a brush and shovel to get the manure for his roses.

Fish and chips served in newspaper.

Sugar butties with plenty of butter – how’s that for healthy eating! (I should point out they were an exceptional treat!)

Collected Sayings of a Big Brother

 
Here are some of GB’s more frequent sayings -

“Completely, utterly, absolutely..."
"That's not an issue"
"I have to say..."
"In actual fact...."
"Nothing on the face of the earth...".
"Really..." and "Really, really...."
“The answer to your question is – I don’t know.”
“Success to temperance”. (This was our grandmother’s toast on those rare occasions she had a sherry or a cherry brandy).
 

21 plus

 
I have, with GB’s help, mentioned a few of Dad’s phrases recently and I thought I should balance it up by recalling some of Mum’s but I’ve had problems remembering many special things that she said.

Apart from always giving her age as “21 plus” (until she was about eighty and allowed her age to be mentioned), the only catchphrases we could recall was the answer to the question ‘What's for dinner?’

Mum's answer was sometimes "Asquith" or "Asquith Pudding". (In 1916 PM Herbert Asquith was much criticised for his 'Wait and see' policies in relation to the Easter Rising and, indeed, despite introducing liberal reforms much of his time in office was one of a ‘Wait and see’ attitude and a lack of positive leadership in a crisis. )